The pain you cause her when you “vanish” after being intimate with her, is selfish and unkind

I feel it is time for me to write about this. Every other woman I speak to, has been in this situation…

This blog is for men explaining the women’s side, how she feels when she opens up to you. And how painful it is for her to not hear from you after.

You have taken the time to meet her and get to know her. Surely, you have used your skills as a gentleman to get closer. Which means you can be a gentleman ….haha

For her to decide to get intimate with you, she needs to see, feel and believe that you are a potential partner, someone she can trust.

You can argue and say that you saw something in her for you to move to the next level and she was under no pressure to sleep with you.

But this is the thing:

As long as there is no equality in the way society regards “experienced” men  vs. “promiscuous” women, the act of getting intimate will be felt as  

Giver (her)  & receiver (you) 

Getting intimate is a fun & important way to test your future together. For most, chemistry in bed is a deal breaker.

Which is why it is important to “test the water” relatively early.


The level of chemistry you had together should have NO IMPACT on your level of thoughtfulness after!

If for whatever reason you decide there is no future for a relationship, be kind and end it like the gentleman you are.


Dont wait too long with writing/calling her back after

Thank her – yes, THANK HER – She is the giver remember – for the time you spent together.

Tell her she’s beautiful

And wish her a nice day.

Thats all it takes to be kind & thoughtful.